Battle of the Soul
📓6 August 2026
Message from my theta brain last night at 2 a.m. was, "You can't afford to be unconscious."
Should I let go of the expectation that my husband will listen to me with full attention when I reveal my heart with deep, meaningful, sensitive stuff? And if he doesn't, should it be the reason that triggers my wound of being unseen and abandoned?
No.
The wound is mine. I can't control his will. Simple.
Should I just not care about what we do or don't do to one another? Then what is the point of two people being together?
To practice our own non-action?
How absurd.
Drop the urge to control!
I feel my heart sink, deflated. Collapse. It hurts, and very uncomfortable.
This must be the feeling of ego dying. Ego death.
The stomach is also collapsing, like when I feel the great panic of an anxious old wound that still throbs and gradually weakens my internal organs.
This was what I fought with yesterday.
Not the husband. Not his ego.
Mine.
No spam, no sharing to third party. Only you and me.
